Messing up is the name of my game.  Idealist at heart, I see my mistakes as I am making them and then I have a hard time letting them go.  I say “no” to visiting with a friend when I should say “yes,” I am not patient with my daughter when I am the one running late, I am selfish instead of serving my husband.  Again and again, I chose me instead of looking around and being so overwhelmed with thanksgiving with having every single desire that I have ever wished upon met in my here and now.  I am living the dream.  As a little girl, when I sat with my chin resting on my palm, staring out the window and thinking what I wanted in my wildest dreams, it is this!  It is my husband and my daughter and this life that I live.  I am ashamed that so many days, I stress about cleaning my home instead of playing “Littlest PetShop” with Madison, I am ashamed that I snap at my husband. But not today.

Today, I look at them and I will spend my whole entire day thanking God for them!  Today, I will squeeze Madison tight and kiss her cheek over and over until she wiggles free to go play with her cousins.  Today, I will just sit on the couch with James’s arm around me.  Today, I am immensely thankful for my almost 8,000 new friends that I am sharing life with through Beautiful Life with Cancer.  Today, I am thankful for my in-laws that I miss that I can’t be with today.  Today I will join hands with my humongous extended family as we pray and thank our Savior for living a life of suffering and dying a tortured death so that I can live my life of blessing and partake in the hope and joy of a future in heaven, today I will feast and I will be thankful.  Today, I give thanks.


30 thoughts on “happy THANKSGIVING!

  1. I believe we all have our moments of weakness and selfishness, but those are things I still believe we should be thankful for. Because is that not the true measure of your husbands, and daughters love! To love you even when you are not doing the right thing means that they do because they have chosen to just as you are. That is what I am most thankful for my wife, she loves me unconditionally. I do not believe the good lord wishes us to suffer but to awaken us to the wonderful possibilities around us that we may have over looked otherwise. Have a blessed and warm Thanks Giving!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Don’t beat yourself up Caroline. You are a great person everyday. Wish we were there as well. Happy Thanksgiving & give that son & beautiful grandaughter of ours a big hug & kiss for us. God Bless you all!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Reblogged this on A Really Full Life and commented:
    This vulnerably honest post from Caroline describes many of us, BUT she moves past her own failures to remind herself and us of all she has to be thankful for.

    Today is a day to count our blessings and name them one by one.

    That old saying is a subtle reminder to me that our greatest blessings aren’t things at all, but the people God has brought into our lives 😉

    Happy Thanksgiving

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I feel the same way so many times. All of it. ……. Just got your book today (that was much faster than they said it would come) and already can’t put it down. I hope you see wild success. God bless you, friend. Debbie.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. A very honest post, describing all of us, because we all do the same mistakes and although we KNOW they are mistakes we continue doing them and feel guilty tomorrow, but I believe that doesn’t stop us from being thankful for what we have.

    Happy Thanksgiving to all of you

    Liked by 1 person

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