I am the Biggest Feminist of Them All

The 6:15 alarm is painful. I am NOT a morning person. Hair sticking up, eyes still closed, and promising myself that “Tonight, I WILL get to bed early!” I drag myself into the bathroom. A few minutes later, my husband arrives with a hot mug of coffee. I’ve been waiting on it. I expect it.

Rick Johnson writes to dads in his book, “That’s My Girl,” telling them to teach their daughters how to expect to be treated. He tells a story of his then high school daughter stopping at the door outside of her high school waiting, waiting…most of the boys not knowing what was happening. Eventually, one of them would get a clue and open the door for her.

I recently wrote a post about James taking Madison to a Father – Daughter Dance. It included car doors opened for her, it included flowers, being guided through the dance floor and showing her that she is loved and protected.

I am one of the extremely small minority that has the immense blessing of being a stay at home mom. I have been supported in spending my days taking care of our family and teaching our daughter, while James works hard to financially provide for our family. This has allowed me the immense pleasure of pursuing my dream of writing. When my GPS acts up, I call my husband expecting him to guide me through directions, and he does. If the TV is turned on, I am getting a back massage. I expect to be protected, provided for, and just plain pampered.

“Oh, that is just you. You have no idea what most other women have to endure!” Yes. You are right.

“Women should be allowed to pursue a career.” Yes. I agree with you.

“You think women are weak.” No. I do not believe that at all. I do believe men and women, boys and girls, are different. But they are both strong in their own way.

Women’s Rights. Yeah, I believe in them! But sometimes I am just not sure what the Feminist Movement is fighting for. Those women look at someone like me and say, “You don’t need a man. Stand up for yourself.” So, my response: NEED? No. I could do this life on my own, but why in the hell would I want to when THIS is an option?!

So, you have decided you want this also? But there are not many men out there like James? Trust me, I know. There are a lot, a LOT, of jerks out there that think that women are only good for one thing. Do not accept that! Do not accept all men are like that, because they are NOT! Be a feminist and demand a man that respects you. Demand a man that will love, protect, provide, and pamper you. Women, realize just how strong you are. If this is what women demanded of men, trust me, they would change. Because, after all, we are women.

I am published!  Please click on the link below for more information and to purchase


BookCoverImage     IMG_0050


35 thoughts on “I am the Biggest Feminist of Them All

  1. Hi my sis! I loved this. Like your James, I have a Jeff who treats me the same way. I wouldn’t change it for nothing. He is my soul-mate who loves the hell out of me.He loves me like Christ loves the church. He spoils me and allows me to be me. I, too, had the wonderful privilege of being a stay home mom, and it was awesome! When I was ready to start back working, now that my babies are not babies anymore (high school and college student), it was my choice. I’m blessed to have my hubbie in my life and likewise for him (lol). I thought about my hubbie taking our daughter to their first father/daughter date. It was beautiful and such a meaningful occasion. Jeff showed (and shows) our daughter how a man should treat a woman and how she should DEMAND to be treated. I laughed at what you wrote about your daughter at the door waiting for someone to open the door.That’s how all of us should be. All of us, as women, should demand to be treated like a queen that we are. Great post and keep doing what you are doing! God bless you sis!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Reblogged this on Simmsx4 and commented:

    Yes, I am a stay at home mother. Yes, my husband provides for us and I have no problem letting him do so…and I am a strong believer in women’s rights.

    Feminists come in all forms. Equal rights/pay/respect for all.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I think some women forget that feminism means choice. When I was a teenager and college student, I don’t think I understood that completely — I thought a woman should stand on her own. Maybe because I was raised by a single parent? But if you choose to stay at home and raise your children and provide a nice home for your husband, then you are a feminist.

    Whatever arrangement works is the one that’s best for you and your family. All about individual choice, nothing more.

    I, too, am a SAHM, and my husband treats me so well. We discussed my going back to work, but he wants me to be happy and also his job is demanding enough that he needs me to keep the home fires burning. Right now, he’s very supportive of me pursuing a writing career and being a SAHM.

    “NEED? No. I could do this life on my own, but why in the hell would I want to when THIS is an option?!” EXACTLY!!!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I must say first, thank you for checking out my blog. As a result I read yours today and am encouraged!!! I’ve been a Christ follower for a long time, raised in a conservative “Christian” home in which I was taught a woman should be submissive, which really meant, “shut up and do what I say cuz that’s what God says!” Clearly the correct definition was not known in my home. But Jesus had a precious way of whispering to me often to stick with Him, and He would teach me who I was and how He valued me and how to expect to be treated. He literally dropped my Parker in my life when he was only 18 and I was 22. Left to my own devices I would have kept dating guys who treated me as I had always been treated. We were married 11 months later. He is such a gift and friend and an amazing example to our kids as to what a Christ-following man looks like. He is a servant and has taught all of us through his example how to be so. He has unbelievable strength and is an amazing leader. And you know what? Not once have I ever heard him tell anyone that he was the leader or head of our home or the boss of our home. He just loves and serves and gives, fills up with more Jesus daily and repeats the process. I am encouraged by your post because so few women within the church in my experience truly know the truth of their value and worth and do not expect to be treated like the princesses of the King that they are. In fact, I’m criticized by many for expecting to be valued and for teaching my girls and boy to value themselves and other women/girls as God does. I’m told I’m not teaching them submission…mostly by other women. So thank you!!! And I get massages all the time too.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Amen! What a testimony! James and I were married very young and I often say, “I had no clue what I was doing, thank God that he did!” We serve an amazing God that loves us and takes care of us even when we do not know what we are doing! He daily shows me his ways and I learn and follow Him, not perfectly, far from it! I am a raging sinner! But he picks me up and start over. And we both know the blessing of a husband that serves the Lord!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Thank you so much for this post. I’m getting married this summer, and both my husband and I will still be in college, but my dream for a long time has been to keep house and write from home, and that is what we are going to try to do. It’s hard to want that when society tells me I need a career and a life of my own, but frankly that sounds exhausting. I am so glad that women’s rights mean the choice to love others and lead the life God has given to me. Keep spreading the word! A God-led life is life and peace!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Congratulations! A wedding! What a wonderful, amazing covenant between you, your new husband, and God! It gives me goosebumps and excitement for you! Can I be a nerd and recommend a book that helped me immensely in my marriage? Sacred marriage by Gary Thomas. Great read! Enjoy love and marriage ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Marriage is definitely an adventure. Married at 21, my wife and I dated for all 4 years of college by which time I knew her whole family, brothers, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandfather. People in Central City, NE still know that guy that married Charlene! even if I can’t remember who they are! 37 years now, and my wife works to support her disabled husband. Still a pain to my ego, as I supported the family for 28 years, and not working is not me! She puts up with me still In spite of my poor house-husbanding skills! I’m not allowed to do laundry as I only separate white and dark! Got to vacuum!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s